I cannot count the number of times I have been telling you I have trouble journeying. It’s still true, but perhaps I should also admit that I tend to sometimes get thrown into what I’ve come to call the odd journey. In this specific journey, there were no guides or spirits – only me, the water and the creatures in it.

It happened to me couple of nights ago, when I had just gone to bed. I am in menopause, so in periods I have trouble falling asleep. This was one of these nights, and I was lying in my bed trying to sleep when I all of a sudden found myself falling into an (to me) unknown part of the ocean. I sank very, very slowly, and I remember thinking about how the hell to breathe. I did breathe – through gills on my arms.

And it was so obviously natural. It was like I’d never done anything else but breathing through gills on my arms. I could even see them.

I sank all the way to the bottom of this ocean. It was very dark, but I could still see. Somewhere down there, I encountered what I believe to be a whale.

What I find most interesting and fascinating with this is, aside from the actual experience of it, what was given to me throughout the whole process. This is a kind of journey that I really, really do appreciate – one where I am given an experience, and the experience itself gives a whole shitload of insight in a variety of things. For example; this time I realized that water and air, as elements, are more alike than I have ever realized.

Both water and air is very supportive, that’s one of the things I realized. Being in the water, I realized it carried me and supported me just like the air did when I was flying with my friend, the very old eagle. With that came also the understanding of the fact that water and air is also what makes it possible for us to stay contained in physical form, through mere compression.

When I was on the bottom of the ocean, everything was moving very slowly. The pressure of the water made it impossible to make large movements quickly. It reminded me of a lesson I was given by the eagle a while back (in one of my very, very few drum journeys) where I learned that the slightest shift in position (of feathers, in his case) is what makes you change direction. The same rings true in the water.

This is a way of learning that I really, really do appreciate. I love being presented with an image or experience, and connect the dots that I find, and find understanding in that. I am a very visual person (I think I said that before, no? 🙂 ), and I do understand and learn the best through metaphores. I just absolutely love it.

I don’t know why this kind of journeys are happening to me. I just know they do, and I am so grateful for it. I am overly fascinated by the realism of them, and how physical the experience is. I really do understand how breathing under water works. At least I did for a day or two afterwards, now the understanding of it has faded. Nevertheless;  the experience is very, very physical, and so fascinating.

What I have decided is that I want to go back into this ocean. I want to learn and understand more about it, since I also want to educate myself about how to relate deep emotional issues with this, and perhaps get a better understanding on how to work with those through water work.

I can’t wait to experience earth and fire too. ♥




This is a blog about my spiritual journey. The focus from january 2019 will be on my entering the shaman path. It’s exciting in every way possible, and I cannot wait to experience more.


Feel free to comment and share – I appreciate it.