This year has been a weird one, thus far. And I mean that in a good way. Already, my brain has decided that I should re-start things I haven’t been doing for years and years. I have already thrown away two of my (inactive) blogs, and I may throw one more away. My old photoblog is now transformed into a blog that will focus on art/photography in theory and practise. How cool is that?
I have to admit I am in awe of the fact that it really feels like I am being told to start doing these things again. So far, there are three or four things that has come up – and things that makes it really hard falling asleep, because I can’t stop thinking about them. In that sense, it’s annoying, but other than that – bloody hell, this is so cool.
One of the things my brain (or inner being, soul, whatever you want to call it) has given me is the fact that while I do enjoy the LOA, I don’t think I can do only that. I believe in many things, and for me to make it/them work, I need to do more than one. That being said, today I was given the thought and idea that I should begin studying shamanism. The idea was so strong that I immediately had to buy two books on the subject.
I don’t intend to become a typical shaman. I am going to be ME – which, speaking of it, is one of my goals concerning my bipolar disorder. Being ME, being authentic, is something extremely important to me, and that’s why I am going to put many things together and form… ME.
Another thing I intend to start doing again, is painting with water colours. I’ve done that (among many other artistic expressions) to and fro during most parts of my life. During the last ten years or so, it’s been absent, however, and only a few days ago I realized I need to begin that again. I almost lost it, but managed not to buy one or two books on the perception of colour. I’ll do that later, though.
All of the things I just described, are parts of something that is also extremely important to me. How we percieve and understand the world around us through what we see, both from a practical and a theoretical point of view. I find these things extremely interesting, and am more than happy to see that I can still do it. For a number of years, most of these things has been pushed back, due to me being so bipolar (ie; from me being in such a bad shape).
Now that I am going to dive into these things again, I do believe that I am going to expand quite rapidly and to be honest, quite largely as well.
It is remarkably fascinating being in this process of growing and becoming. I suppose this can be attributed to the LOA, but I would also like to give praise to my personal growth (thanks to therapy). Getting to know myself better than I ever did has proven hard work, but oh, so worth it.
I actually enjoy spreading myself out, becoming wider in my perception of myself. I enjoy feeling enriched by and with myself. I think it may even give me yet another perspective of the LOA. It is very, very interesting.
So – so far, 2019 has turned out to be quite an interesting year. I can’t remember when I last had that feeling about a new year.
I find it exciting, though, so let’s see this post as a big, fat, THANK YOU, for letting me start on this new chapter with such glorious emotions.